As Malcolm Gladwell tells us in Outliers, extreme success is nearly always the result of extreme effort. Michael was extraordinary principally because he chose to work at it. So can we. Researcher Carol Dweck reports that nearly all people who are considered experts or masters at something have simply practiced much more than only competent people. I think Tiger Woods, Eli Manning, John Grisham, Steve Jobs and other over-the-top achievers would agree. They focus their talent on being great in a certain way, their way, and over-invest in themselves. The result is unique competence and often spectacular results. So one inspiring thing we can all take from Michael Jackson is that when humans are inspired to do things with enough drive, determination and relentless practice, greatness can result.

But even with extraordinary greatest, all of us are flawed. And no matter how hard we may discipline ourselves, those flaws dog us or new ones appear. To be human is to be flawed. Our flaws are widely seen and yes even talked about. Perhaps the greatest flaw is the arrogance of thinking our own shortcomings don’t matter. I think most of us would rather be judged by our sincere intentions than our uneven behavior. Which brings me back to Michael Jackson. People who knew him best and people who worked with him (I happened to know one of his producers in the 1980s) said he brimmed with positive intention and gentle kindness. Yes, he was afflicted by inner demons (The Man in the Mirror), and who knows how all those demons played out, but all of us have at some time in our lives battled our own darkness. It’s then we need affirming friends who call us on our crap and lift us to higher ground. Authentic friendship is both tough and loyal. I am not sure Michael had many real friends. Friends who didn’t need or want anything from him. All of us need such friends and need to be such friends. All of us. As the singer wrote, “We are the world.” It’s up to us to “make it a better place.”

What’s the best thing we can do? Be a great friend to someone today. A friend that encourages persistence, effort and practice towards worthwhile goals and a friend who also holds up a mirror and says, “You’re better than that!” when our friends give in to their weakness. That’s a friend.

We must create our own opportunities.  Now more than ever.  It’s the nature of industrial capitalism to make all jobs generic.  That way labor is just a unit of cost.  Nobody’s special; everyone’s replaceable.  Humans are made cogs in a giant worldwide money machine.  This is the major issue of our career future.  A study from the University of California at Berkeley estimates that as many as 14 million current U.S. jobs could be lost in the next 10 years.  Such a job extinction could increase structural unemployment to nearly 12%.  That’s more than a recession; that’s a tragedy.  The biggest body count is likely to be among the young (ages 15-40).  They are coming into the workforce with little experience and often with inadequate education.  Not much to trade in the swap meet of hyper competitive world labor.

Many business leaders, economists, and the business press say such a job destruction is healthy, as if human lives are ripe for pruning like a fruit tree.  They tell us, grow up, face reality.  It’s the business cycle at work.  Well, it’s not inevitable.  It’s a choice.  It’s the result of economic, trade, education and tax policy.  It’s a choice today’s leadership class is making.  After all, their kids will have trust funds.  So, not to worry.  In the large sweep of history, change always creates casualties they tell us.  It even has a name…creative destruction.  It doesn’t sound so good if it’s your life that’s being creatively destroyed, however.

Such thinking is wrong.  The companies that are growing most profitably are those that conduct business differently than their competitors.  Fortune Magazine recently published its annual list of the 100 best companies to work for.

Mostly they have one thing in common, they put employees first and rely on those employees to come up with constant innovations to reduce costs and increase value.  Companies like Costco, Southwest Airlines, Starbucks, WL Gore, Netflix, eBay, Google, SAS Institute are not just great places to work, they are great engines of human capitalism.

When we face the truth we understand that no matter who signs our paycheck, we are all self-employed.  All jobs are contingent.  If you are going to work for someone, only work for the industry leaders who are successful by not competing on price, but creating new, mind blowing value for customers.  These are companies that have few direct competitors.  They’re different.  They have leaders who embrace social responsibility and environmental sustainability.  They are both large and famous and small and unknown.  They exist in nearly every city and town in America.

But whether you work for a great enterprise or for yourself, the future of jobs is going to look like a war.  Huge explosions of new technology and new competitors that will obliterate companies, change industries and create un-thought of opportunities.  My message is don’t be a casualty.

But there is an answer.  As far as I can tell, the only answer.  It has three dimensions:

1.    Express your design. What makes you different is what makes you valuable, irreplaceable.  Self-knowledge is essential to your future.  Ultimately we are valued for who we are (traits and talents) more than what we know.  If we find ourselves in jobs where we cannot positively express our unique gifts; if we are only valued for our generic skills, the clock is ticking.  It’s only a matter of time before someone hungrier, smarter, and cheaper will take your place.  Only you, the unique you, can’t be duplicated.  Be you.

2.    Pursue your desire. Excellence at any endeavor requires strategic persistence.  This is consistent striving combined with readily embracing feedback, results and reality so that successful adjustments can be made.  If we are trying to achieve someone else’s goals that don’t give us a personal buzz, we will not excel over time.  We simply won’t do what it takes to be amazing.  Being amazing requires inner motivation.  Competing with someone else’s frantic ambition is not a serious problem if our motivation is intrinsic.  We will do well because we enjoy doing more than necessary.  If we are just racing to win a medal, we will lose to many who will simply out train us.

3.    Make love your prime motive. Daniel Goleman has shown that Emotional Intelligence is essential to career success.  Emotional Intelligence is a fancy term for understanding our design and being clear on our desires combined with emotional maturity, empathy and collaboration.  Emotional maturity frees us from acting on fear and fires us with love.   Empathy and collaboration are the pillars of social wisdom.  Empathy and collaboration are not primarily skills, although lots of company training programs try to teach you how to listen empathically and behave collaboratively.  But like words without music, the outer action without inner conviction is empty.  Love makes the quality of empathy and richness of collaboration work.  When love is your prime motive, everyone feels it.  They act better, think better and do better.

In today’s hyper collaborative world, people with high social wisdom are the first hired and the last fired.  They are the connective tissue of enterprise, the glue between company and customer, management and workforce.

Although the power of love can be expressed over fiber optic cable through voice (telephone) or data (email), there is nothing more powerful than personal presence. Thus, the most global proof jobs of the future are those that require us to be in a specific place with specific people to express our design.  Often, these careers combine personal service, high skill and individualized creativity.  If you want to be indispensable, make your personal presence a central part of the value you bring others.  Engage people with love.

The answer in a nutshell:  Don’t compete, be unique.  You already are.  Just turn up the volume.